“WHAT’S in a name? That which we call a rose by any other name would smell as sweet,” Juliet says to her Romeo. Well, we all know how that one turned out.
What is it with councillors and the need for renaming every overpass, underpass, and intersection? You’d think that after the great Brian Ború shemozzle of 2013 that local representatives would have learned by now to just leave things alone.
I don’t know if they get some perverse kick out of it or what, but as sure as God made gooseberries, our elected representatives are out there, right now, coming up with new titles for every lamppost and pothole in their electoral area.
Maybe christening inanimate objects gives their egos an auld boost?
Anywho, look out Boaty McBoatface, because the lads down in City Hall are at a loose end once more and will soon be putting a name on every junction, crossing or interchange that makes eyes at them.
When you are stopped at some later date by a disoriented tourist looking for Mr Splashy Pants Lane or Blindboy Boatclub Boulevard, remember who to blame when you are puce with mortification – councillors who go around knighting cycle lanes like they’re back in Camelot plotting their quest for the Holy Grail.
For those of you who missed the great Brian Ború hubbub of olden days, before the amalgamation of city and county authorities, it was pure exasperating, altogether.
These were the before times when every local councillor raced the clock down to get their name on as many pieces of public infrastructure in their five-year term as humanly possible. If they could get a Mickey Mouse statue erected, all the better.
During one of these memorable madcap moments in City Hall, it was proposed that the Shannon Bridge at Lower Mallow Street be renamed John Fitzgerald Kennedy Bridge and Merchants Quay be renamed Brian Ború Square. Thankfully, the decision was postponed in the wake of strong local opposition, and we haven’t heard too much talk of putting new names on yokes, until now.
I can’t imagine there will be too many objections to the new name put forward for the Parkway Roundabout by Fianna Fáil councillor Kieran O’Hanlon.
The former mayor is around long enough to remember the time when all hell broke loose after the Abbey Bridge was renamed after Jim Kemmy and a U-turn had to be made. So, in fairness to the man, he’s done his homework, and proposing that the Parkway Roundabout be renamed in honour of five-time All-Ireland winner with Limerick, Gearóid Hegarty, is a safe enough bet. I can’t see too much argument from anyone on that front.
There will definitely be no cows milked out in Rhebogue, if, and when, this comes to pass.
I can just see it now. Gearóid looks at the roundabout, the roundabout looks at Gearóid.
“He grabs the sliotar… he’s on the 50 … he’s on the 40 . . he’s on the 30 … he’s on Aisle 3 inside in the supermarket over in the Parkway, and the roundabout outside beckoning to him.
No better buachaill, too. Luimneach Abú!
