IS it Covid that has taken the sting out of Local Elections 2024? Or maybe the unwashed and deluded far-right nutters pedalling their poisonous wares under the guise of being “citizen journalists” have taken the fun out of the upcoming locals? (I’d love to go at them with a bar of soap after slapping their brazen little arses, let me tell you.)
Or perhaps it’s the perception that Mary Lou and the Shinners already have the elections in the bag that has taken the hot air out of proceedings.
Because to me it feels like those contesting June’s ballot may as well be all at home with the January blues watching daytime television and polishing off the last of the Celebrations for all the get up and go we’re getting out of them.
I have long predicted Local Elections 2024 will be an election unlike any other, but this is just ridiculous.
Seriously folks, I need to have a word with ye because the Valentine’s sweets are already out. Where in God’s name are ye at all with all your old guff? Those promises aren’t going to make themselves. Ye would want to get the lead out now and get out there and point at a few potholes.
Ye will absolutely burst if ye don’t. It’s not good to be keeping all those nonsensical election pledges bottled up inside. Let it out, will ye.
I was chomping at the bit and raring to go after the Christmas holidays. I thought it would all kick off straight away and there would have been a few juicy rows, some mudslinging, and all kinds of carry on to keep me out of trouble for the dry month. Is it trying to drive me to drink, ye are?
It’s time now to stop acting the maggot and pull the socks up.
It is starting to look now that Local Elections 2024 won’t be fought on the doorsteps at all but on social media. They have absolutely banjaxed the whole beauty of the locals with their poxy FaceTube.
Sure, some of these gobdaws deserve a right bollocking from the electorate, but there’s nothing wrong with a bit of constructive criticism. We have been storing it up for five years you know, and it’s not healthy for us to be keeping that in either.
Would ye not be big boys and girls about it and get out on them streets? From what I can see, they are only knocking on doors in areas where they know it will be all polite smiles and snapping doggies muzzled out the back. I have never seen the like of it, where are our hardy stock in the face of all these doorbell dodgers?
I mean, this week, at the very first Metropolitan meeting of the year, it was as sedate and toothless The Late Late Show. If I hadn’t gotten a good eight hours sleep the night before I would have nodded off. It was minus craic altogether.
Dog parks and bridge lighting they were flapping over. I have seen more pep at Regional Health Forum meetings.
We might as well call the whole thing off. I don’t know if all our local political candidates have been told to keep as low a profile as possible up in party HQ or what, but these dry-sh*tes would want to start eating the heads off each other pronto for the good of us all.
And c’mere to me while I have you, we might as well make Green Party TD Brian Leddin Directly Elected Mayor at this stage now as he is the only one not making a secret of his nomination for the big job.
Ye would want to be getting to sucking diesel and be quick about it.
